Do babies have sixth sense? What do you think? I think perhaps, yes. Because I am not able to figure out why my son is crying unnecessarily since past two days (ya ya, babies do cry at times, they may be teething, would be cold for the weather has changed suddenly in Hyderabad etc etc), but not getting relaxed with his babysitter and immediately silent when I lift him up and coo. So I’m the last two days, he cried when babysitter tried to feed him broccoli (he loves it other times), took him out for a walk (he loves this too other times), tried to massage him (oh, the way he cried then, I had to give him a bear mommy hug to relax him) etc etc. So, what is your take? Ok, I missed out mentioning one point. In ten days time, I am joining office. So has he realised this that I would not be available all day long and that I am trying to distance myself, not that I am able to, but just in thoughts so that he can stay a few hours away from me. Yes, it is difficult for a mother as well, but adults cope up easily (I am consoling myself right now), hey isn’t that so? Please please please, do not say otherwise, or I will be melancholic for rest of my time here at home. Now this is enough drama for this post, time for funny takes as far as I can remember:
So in my office WhatsApp group, a colleague posted a picture and I immediately recognised another guy as my engineering friend. But, the sort of remembrance I have and the way I muddle up faces, I checked the other guy’s Facebook page if the photograph looks similar, and yes it did. However, still just to cross check, I pinged him on FB messenger, and voila it turns out this guy joined the team this week. And this is how the conversation on WhatsApp followed (sharing for proof, in case you do not believe me and there are spelling mistakes too):
Another instance: it so happened that I got contacted by someone very special four times within a week where we do not even connect for months at a row and the last two times, I teased “him” (him is a generic pronoun in a sentence here) and gave some lecture that what has suddenly happened that he is remembering me so many times now, and explicitly mentioning to him that I used to skip this tease (taane maarna) lately for the sole reason that why to waste those precious moments of our conversation when it happens at once in a blue moon basis.
Ok ok, fine, all words I speak, rather write here are not necessarily truth, some can be made up as well. What you take away as fact or fiction is all upto you, my dear. Now this is called too much vella (free) time at hand. And also this is called love for oneself; when others do not express it that freely, it is upto you to keep yourself happy. By the way, I am just practicing writing inspired by the protagonist of Amazon Prime TV series The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel. What do you think? You like it or the concept of female stand up comedian? Tell me, tell me, tell me all in the comments below.
It is only when one is pregnant or has been such that one would know how it feels like for that first feeling of having a baby inside or seeing him/ her for the first time. No, the feeling cannot be equated with that of the spouse, the husband. Because for mothers, it is hundred times more. Ok ok, I will modify. Usually, it is hundred time more. Other times, much much more and well, others, ummm, no comments.
The first time I heard its 💓 (heartbeat) in the doctor’s clinic, it was a feeling out of the world. I mean, I had out of the world feeling before as well, I mean, you know what I am referring to, right? But this. This can not be described in words. In fact, that too, but now I can, I mean I guess so, well because of the effect of too many books being read. Gosh, what am I writing. Am I making any sense to you, tell tell… Please tell me in comments.
So, just few minutes back, I was talking to another friend of mine, she is due in two months and I asked her if they do a 3D scan as well in Patna. She said no, but it reminded me of my times. The baby in foetus felt so shy that we tried this 3D scan 3 different days (not counting the number of times and breaks we took the same day to get baby’s position changed) to see the baby’s face, but every time, he kept his fist in front of him. We were able to see those tiny weeny hands, legs, fingers curling into fists, but it seemed like, as my mom said, baby would give its darshan/ muh-dikhaayi (show) only once he is born.
And the first time I saw him in delivery room, so white, so pink, so soft, so fragile and ah, so so tiny, I fell in love with him. Well, the nurses had cleaned him up and then only gave him to me for the mother’s first touch. Oops I am repetiting what I wrote few months back on my blog of falling in love at first sight, which earlier, I mean, before baby, I never used to believe in, though some of my very close friends (??) were very clear about.
So, what do you think? How was your experience? Or, you are expecting and scared? Or, scared of having a baby? Tell me, tell me all about it. But sach mei (truth be told), this is an amazingly amazing feeling.
Thinking of title for a given blog post gets so tough. In fact, you know there was a time when I used to keep noting down writing prompts from wordpress and whenever I used to write, for that matter anything under the sun, I would pick up something from that list of prompts as title. So, this time, since there is a little paucity of time, what with baby calling for your attention at any opportune time, I have chosen to take an even easier shortcut. Most of my posts on baby, going forward, whene’er they will feature my son and my husband will simply be numbered with title baby and hubby. But please read carefully, it says baby and hubby and not baby hubby, they are two separate people. You did not get my joke? Ok ok, leave it; it was just a very bad PJ. It is not necessary that both of us should have same sense of humor. Have not you heard about that XYZ research as well which says males and females have different sense of humor? I mean all such research keeps on happening, and that too at such a high frequency that you cannot keep a track of them, the sample size of each such research makes everything so incredibly foolish.
So ummm, I got too much on a different tangent, sorry sorry, back to the topic please.
Have you noticed how does the elephant move? Or, if you have done sawaari (elephant ride), just close your eyes for a moment and try to remember how you would have moved then.
Still do not remember? Arey, do not worry, baba. I asked you to close your eyes just to give you a break of screen presence and rest to your eyes. Just see any video on YouTube, vimeo, etc. It so happened today that when my hubby was taking baby out for a stroll in the morning in babywear bag (this happens only on holidays when hubby can spare more time in the morning otherwise mommi is always there for baby’s natural vitamin D time. Mommi = me me me), the baby was comfortably moving to and fro, and the hubby compared his movement to elephant ki sawaari (ride). And correlating, I simply said – haha, look at you, you and elephant. What a joke!! (Well, I said something less dramatic that if he is that, then are you not an elephant, and saying this, I grinned big).
Achha, tell me, do I use too many words in parentheses? I know yaar, it is tough for me to put across so many thoughts sprinting across my mind as soon as I start writing anything and everything starts getting jumbled up. I don’t know when this will be better and such an awesome fluid flow, my writing, of course.
Anyway, let me end this post now with a song:
Chal chal chal mere haathi
O mere saathi
Chal re chal khataara kheech k
Chale aa, dhakka maar
(Move move move my elephant
O my friend
Move o move this waste of a vehicle
Walk and pull this away)
Bad translation, no? I know. But then you know, keep smiling and have an awesomely awesome day.
P.S.: Hubby made baby eat chicken today, so baby hit a milestone 😊
P.P.S.: My brother gave him cycle today of which baby was happy playing with first pedal and then with its screws 😂
I, these days, wonder if my sense of humor has bettered or it was just great all those years or perhaps, I am just realizing now. Sounds like too much self-obsessed or pompous? Well, you tell me. Oh, by the way, for my memories and to tell my son of these olden golden days when he grows up, I have just thought to jot down few scenes from my current life (yes yes, there was a past – “the before baby” past).
One of my closest friends pinged me today and out of the blue she says, ok, here is the exact quote:
I love u a lot .. I can’t explain.. I may act stupid or idiot or insensitive some times but I do love u from the bottom of my heart.. plz forgive me for all the times I hv hurt u.. n plz love me always
And I reply back saying girls usually get so sentimental when they are PMSing or are pregnant, so which one is she? Mean of me, right? But then I added a footnote immediately saying this was just as a light jest.
Then there are these awesome days of interaction between the baby and my husband. Sample these (happened yesterday; the earlier interactions, unfortunately, I already forgot):
Baby: Psstttt psstttt (making sound and throwing spit)
Husband: Aaru, do not do this (and lifts him up)
Baby: Psstttt psstttt (throws spit on husband’s face)
It is recently that we started our baby on food after annaprashan or muh-juthi or ceremony of first food. So, as a family meal during dinner yesterday, I was feeding my baby spoons of dal and giving him bites of roti as finger food for playing/ eating (so, the logic is that if baby eats whatever play thing we have given him, we should give food also in similar way. Once he gets the hang of taste and chewing, he will slowly love food). Baby was throwing roti chunks all over the floor.
Husband: Baby, do not throw roti. See how I am eating. Chew chew chew.
And the baby took an aim to throw roti near my husband.
It was simply hilarious. But if you could not laugh at this, then I guess, I am not yet good with words in explaining scenes (ah, the day is still so far when I will write something worthwhile to be published as a book) and need to polish my communication on paper.
I want to end this post with how I am making my son say his first words as mummi (mom in Hindi) and this I put it on repeat many times every day:
Aaru ki mummaa
Once a baby is born, people usually celebrate his/her birthday every month. And here, I was all forgetful. Today my baby completed 6 months and neither my husband nor I remembered late in the day and that too when someone else mentioned it. Did we do something special? I guess not or perhaps yes, in a way. So let’s see, whatever my short memory can conjure at the end of today, 5th of Nov 2018. Writing this post for the sole reference of my future remembrances.
Daddy went out for his yearly eye test. And me and mommy played in the verandah (portico) for an hour and a half in the Sun. That was a first.
I woke up and didn’t find mommy. I cried a little so that mommy comes running away. Alas, she didn’t. Daddy made me milk, but yuck, it does not have any taste and so, I didn’t have any. I don’t know how I used to gulp that when I was little. Perhaps, I was hungry. Perhaps, mommy was still learning to be with me. Or, perhaps I was forced. That memory is too hazy for me to remember. So back to now, I was in verandah with a house-help and a car came up. I heard mommy’s voice calling me Aaru and stretched my hands for her to pick me up. She immediately did and hugged me tight. Oh, I missed you mommy so much. I guess this was a first too, but then my early memories are hazy.
I woke up from sleep. I cried for mommy to pick me up and give me doddhuu (milk). She fed me good tasty one and I fell asleep again. After that, things are a bit hazy. I remember a little – mommy lifting me up, sitting with her in car, car moving and then I woke up and found myself in a studio. Photo studio. Thank God, mommy was there. No one else came. I don’t know what daddy was upto, for I didn’t see him during this entire trip. I was made to sit on a bench with white background with mommy holding me up and bright lights flashing in my eyes. Mommy says pic done. Ah, so that’s what photo studio does. Now, that’s definitely my first. We collected pics and came back home, my dadi’s (grandmother or daddy’s mommy) happily.
Lastly and the best time, mommy made daddy turn off mobile and play with me in a tent. Yes, the tent. Ah, it was so so much fun. I sang. I giggled. I turned and tossed. Played with daddy’s ears. Played with mommy when she tried to feed me in between. The lights pilfering through tent added to the charm.
Fun. Fun. Fun. Total fun. This was definitely my best day. So many firsts… Yo! Now signing off. My time to sleep. Good night all older people and a few younger ones (for I have till date, met less than 5 babies younger to me). Sweet dreams everyone. Now say cheese and paneer and sleep with a smile.
How do you expose your kid(s) to smoking and alcohol?
Oops. Telling our kid(s) that something is taboo, I am sure would not work in today’s scenario. There has to be a (healthy) discussion around that. Considering yourself uncomfortable? But that’s parenthood. One has to tackle all such things, and books certainly help in putting a point across. And someone very wise once told me that he takes out his sister for drinking so that she can enjoy herself to the full. And why not? Normalising anything is very important. Be it sex, girl-boy difference or anything as such. But let me delegate all such things to future posts.
My son is too small to understand all this, but I am just writing all these points, basically whatever comes to my mind while I interact with other moms, for my own future reference. So what strategy you are going to take when your kid asks you? A total NO for smoking and alcohol? Or, a healthy discussion?
P.S. I forgot to mention in my last post that whenever my son is in the mood while feeding, there is the sweetest song he sings. Yes, singing and drinking together, which makes me forget everything and everyone else, literally and figuratively. Tell me, isn’t that a true unadulterated love? Oh, I am not the lovey-dovey mom always, but yes, most times! And here, I go, making my P.S., which is a mere note, longer than my original post. 🙊 So, bye until we meet next on some other topic!👋
So I have listening to a lot of songs these days to give myself the much needed company while being on maternity leave and just noticed that if you select few lines of many songs, it will seem like the song is being written for the baby. But then, these are the words of a mesmerized new mom. I remember few years back, I had commented something similar on a friend’s poem written for the love of his life and I compared it with the guy writing for his future daughter. Ah, I was just in a teasing mode then. Those silly times. I am definitely matured now as compared to then. Hehe.
Song for the love at first sight in hospital as the baby was born and there the baby smiled for the very first time in my arms, omg, that was definitely a truly freeze-frame moment:
Aate Jaate, Hanste Gaate
Socha Tha Maine Mann Mein Kai Baar
Woh Pehli Nazar, Halka Sa Asar
Karta Hai Kyun Is Dil Ko Bekaraar?
Aate Jaate, Hanste Gaate
Socha Tha Maine Mann Mein Kai Baar
Hothon Ki Kali, Kuch Aur Khili
Yeh Dil Pe Hua Hai Kiska Ikhtiyaar
(Song from the movie Maine Pyar Kiya)
Then again when the baby spreads his hands for me to hold him and then looks at me so innocently, that is a feeling which cannot be described in words. Ah but those wakeful nights night after night resulting in tiredness that goes away on seeing him, here is the song:
Tere hathon ki taraf
Mere hathon ka safar
Teri aankhon se kahe
Kuch toh meri nazar
Rozana main sochun yehi
Kahan aaj kal main hoon lapata
Tujhe dekh toh hansne lage
Mere dard bhi kyun khamakhan
Hawaon ki tarah
Mujhe chhu ke tu guzar
(Song from the movie Naam Shabana)
And here is the song for the fun part when I think of baby all the time these days:
Chori chori kiya re
Dil yeh dil liya re
Jadu se jadu kiya kiya re
Jaagi soyi rahoon
Khoyi khoyi rahoon
Uski yadon mein
Uske khwaabo mein
Jhoome jiya re
Crazy Kiya Re
Main yahan bhi gayi
Main wahan bhi gayi
Socha pal pal usey
Main jahan bhi gayi
(Song from the movie Dhoom 2)
These are just the random songs I heard today and thought of coining this post. And hey, one poem from my side too:
Mera naam hai Coco
Mere papa ko pasand hai choco
Mummi ne dekhi recent movie Coco
Aur kha gayi mere hisse ki bhi Choco
(no no, my kid’s name is not Coco)
What do you think? Tell me your crazy moment as a new mom/ dad.
You realize times have changed when your “best” rather “best-est” friend cannot find time even once a week to connect with and when I say connect, it is as simple as a simple 2 minute call/ email/ message when before both of you were inseparable. Is it what motherhood does? Alienate others that now you are not in their league? Are not that much fun? Because you think all the person now does is talk about the baby? But what if she doesn’t want to? What if she thinks that this is what she is supposed to do for it is the societal norms? What if she wants to take a break even though the baby is super cute and she loves him/ her? What if she wants to know all about you for that is the only avenue she can have with the outside world after being caged for months in a house? What if when she talks about the baby, it is at times to hide behind the fact that she cannot now be so free like you are now? Probably I had behaved the same with others but who remembers the mistakes one do. But unless one becomes a parent, you will not realize. But but but fatherhood can never be the same as motherhood for Indian laws itself discriminates between both of them. Mom is still supposed to look after all necessities of the baby, what with six months of maternity leave and all, but no paternity leave even in some companies.
So all things aside, this is simply the rant of a new mother awake at unearthly hours. And if you know someone such, say a hello today because you never know how much it will mean to her seeing otherwise all the different interactions you have on social media even after knowing the fact that social media paints more of a happy picture but hey, she is not even having that now!
P.S: The character(s) referred to in this article are not at all fictitious. Any resemblance to living or dead is purely intentional.